10 Things Successful People Never Do Again...

 

 

 

 

 

 

We all make mistakes but the people who thrive from their mistakes are the successful ones.

“Never go back.” What does that mean? From observations of successful people, clinical psychologist and author of Never Go Back: 10 Things You'll Never Do Again (Howard Books, June 2014), Dr. Henry Cloud has discovered certain “awakenings” that people have—in life and in business—that once they have them, they never go back to the old way of doing things. And when that happens, they are never the same. In short, they got it.

“Years ago, a bad business decision of mine led to an interesting discussion with my mentor,” Dr. Cloud says. “I had learned a valuable lesson the hard way, and he reassured me: ‘The good thing is once you learn that lesson, you never go back. You never do it again.’

 

 

 

 

 

 

“I wondered, what are the key awakenings that successful people go through that forever change how they do things, which propel them to succeed in business, relationships, and life? I began to study these awakenings, researching them over the years.”

Although life and business have many lessons to teach us, Dr. Cloud observed 10 “doorways” of learning that high performers go through, never to return again.

Successful people never again…

1. Return to what hasn’t worked. Whether a job, or a broken relationship that was ended for a good reason, we should never go back to the same thing, expecting different results, without something being different.

2. Do anything that requires them to be someone they are not. In everything we do, we have to ask ourselves, “Why am I doing this? Am I suited for it? Does it fit me? Is it sustainable?” If the answer is no to any of these questions, you better have a very good reason to proceed.

3. Try to change another person. When you realize that you cannot force someone into doing something, you give him or her freedom and allow them to experience the consequences. In doing so, you find your own freedom as well.

4. Believe they can please everyone. Once you get that it truly is impossible to please everyone, you begin to live purposefully, trying to please the right people.

5. Choose short-term comfort over long-term benefit. Once successful people know they want something that requires a painful, time-limited step, they do not mind the painful step because it gets them to a long-term benefit. Living out this principle is one of the most fundamental differences between successful and unsuccessful people, both personally and professionally.

6. Trust someone or something that appears flawless. It’s natural for us to be drawn to things and people that appear "incredible." We love excellence and should always be looking for it. We should pursue people who are great at what they do, employees who are high performers, dates who are exceptional people, friends who have stellar character, and companies that excel. But when someone or something looks too good to be true, he, she, or it is. The world is imperfect. Period. No one and no thing is without flaw, and if they appear that way, hit pause.

7. Take their eyes off the big picture. We function better emotionally and perform better in our lives when we can see the big picture. For successful people, no one event is ever the whole story. Winners remember that – each and every day.

8. Neglect to do due diligence. No matter how good something looks on the outside, it is only by taking a deeper, diligent, and honest look that we will find out what we truly need to know: the reality that we owe ourselves.

9. Fail to ask why they are where they find themselves. One of the biggest differences between successful people and others is that in love and in life, in relationships and in business, successful people always ask themselves, what part am I playing in this situation? Said another way, they do not see themselves only as victims, even when they are.

10. Forget that their inner life determines their outer success. The good life sometimes has little to do with outside circumstances. We are happy and fulfilled mostly by who we are on the inside. Research validates that. And our internal lives largely contribute to producing many of our external circumstances.

And, the converse is true: people who are still trying to find success in various areas of life can almost always point to one or more of these patterns as a reason they are repeating the same mistakes.

Everyone makes mistakes…even the most successful people out there. But, what achievers do better than others is recognize the patterns that are causing those mistakes and never repeat them again. In short, they learn from pain—their own and the pain of others.

A good thing to remember is this: pain is unavoidable, but repeating the same pain twice, when we could choose to learn and do something different, is certainly avoidable. I like to say, “we don’t need new ways to fail….the old ones are working just fine!” Our task, in business and in life, is to observe what they are, and never go back to doing them again.

 

 

 

45 Pieces of Career Advice That Will Get You to the Top

By The Daily Muse Editor

When it comes to your career, sometimes it feels like you could use all the advice you can get. From picking the "right" career to actually excelling in it, there's certainly a lot to learn.

And that's why we've gathered our all-time best career advice. From starting out at the bottom of the totem pole to advancing to a more senior position to—who knows?—maybe even branching out to open your own business, we've collected 45 of the best tips for whatever stage you're at in your career.

On Working a Not-Quite-Dream-Job

1. The best career or job is the one in which you’re using the skills you enjoy. But, not every job needs to address all of your passions. Use every job as an opportunity to learn something new and keep an open mind; you may find that you really enjoy something you never imagined would appeal to you. Miriam Salpeter, Founder of Keppie Careers

2. Don't take yourself (or your career) too seriously. Plenty of brilliant people started out in jobs they hated, or took paths that weren't right at the beginning of their careers. Professional development is no longer linear, and trust that with hard work and a dedication to figuring out what you want to do with your life, you, too, will be OK! Kathryn Minshew, CEO of The Muse
3. Every person you meet is a potential door to a new opportunity—personally or professionally. Build good bridges even in that just-for-now job, because you never know how they’ll weave into the larger picture of your life. Kristina Leonardi, Career Coach
4. My friend Andre said to me, "You know, Marissa, you’re putting a lot of pressure on yourself to pick the right choice, and I’ve gotta be honest: That’s not what I see here. I see a bunch of good choices, and there’s the one that you pick and make great." I think that’s one of the best pieces of advice I’ve ever gotten.” Marissa Mayer, CEO of Yahoo!
5. No matter how low on the totem poll you are or how jaded you’ve become by your to-do list, it’s still important to show up early, wear something sharp, and avoid Facebook like the plague. I discovered that when I acted like a professional, I suddenly felt like my work was a lot more valuable. “Looking the part” boosted my confidence, helped me begin to see myself as a highly capable contributor to the team—and ultimately led the rest of my team to see me in the same light. Lisa Habersack, Writer 

6. Remember that a job, even a great job or a fantastic career, doesn’t give your life meaning, at least not by itself. Life is about what you learn, who you are or can become, who you love and are loved by. Fran Dorf, Author and Psychotherapist

7. If the career you have chosen has some unexpected inconvenience, console yourself by reflecting that no career is without them. Jane Fonda

On Advancing Your Career

8. Every year or two, spend some time really thinking about your career. Go out and warm up your network, check out new opportunities, and do some salary comparisons. You make smarter career decisions when you have real data. Also, if you are afraid or uncomfortable, you are probably onto something awesome! Fear means you are growing your comfort zone. Christie Mims, Career Coach

9. Don't be afraid to speak up in a meeting or to schedule a sit down with a colleague or boss—whether to hash out details on a project or deal with a sensitive situation. When it comes to having your ideas heard, or to really connecting with co-workers, never underestimate the power of face time and the importance of in-person communication. Catherine Straut, Assistant Editor of Elle

10. You’re setting yourself up for failure if you’re not preparing for an eventual promotion right now. Even if the next step in your career seems far off, you should be taking advantage of training and professional development courses and looking for ways to pitch in and expand your current role. Otherwise, even when the opportunity comes up, you won’t be ready to take advantage of it. Avery Augustine, Writer

11. Take criticism or "feedback" for what it is: a gift given to you to make you better at what you do. Don't concern yourself with the person or the method of delivery. Instead, glean out the teachable nuggets and move on. Michelle Bruno, President of Bruno Group Signature Events

12. I know. You’ve heard it a thousand times: Dress for the job you want, not the one you’ve got. But I think this message goes far beyond the clothes you wear every day: It’s how you present yourself in meetings and at office events, how you interact with staff both above and below you, and how seriously you take your work. Adrian Granzella Larssen, Editor-in-Chief of The Daily Muse

13. In chaos, there is opportunity. Most major career accelerations happen when someone steps into a mess and makes a difference. Kristi Hedges, Leadership Coach

14. Work harder than everyone under you or above you. Nothing commands respect more than a good work ethic. This means being the first one at the event in the morning and the last one to leave in the evening. No one said this gig was easy. Keith Johnston, Event Consultant at Plannerwire

15. When you’re offered a big opportunity, consider it carefully—even if it scares the heck out of you. In the end, high risk often leads to high reward. But if you turn down every opportunity that comes your way, you won’t even have the chance to succeed. Avery Augustine, Writer

On Excelling in Your Career

16. I first heard Zig Ziglar say it when people challenged him on his “positive attitude” manifesto: “You can do anything with a positive attitude better than you can do it with a negative one." Lea McLeod, Career Coach

17. Work hard and be nice to people. It’s a very simple motto I try to live by daily. Marie Burns, Recruiting Leader at Compete

18. There’s never going to be a precisely right moment to speak, share an idea, or take a chance. Just take the moment—don’t let thoughts like "I don’t feel like I’m ready" get in the way. Look to see if you have the main things or the opportunity will pass you by. Don’t let perfect get in the way of really, really good. Kathleen Tierney, Executive Vice President and COO of Chubb Insurance

19. "Find a way to say yes to things. Say yes to invitations to a new country, say yes to meet new friends, say yes to learn something new. Yes is how you get your first job, and your next job, and your spouse, and even your kids." Eric Schmidt, Executive Chairman of Google

20. No matter what your dream job is, you’ll likely hear “no” many times before you achieve your goals. Just accept that as a fact. But by refusing to accept that “no,” you’ll separate yourself from the pack. Sometimes you just have to outlast the competition—and wear down your boss! Shannon Bream, Supreme Court Correspondent at FOX

21. Tenacity and persistence—nothing beats it. Even if your talent isn’t there yet, you can always develop it to what it will eventually be. But people who are persistent and tenacious and driven and have a really clear, defined goal of what they want, nothing compares to that. Not giving up is really huge. Catt Sadler, Anchor at E!

22. Asking for help isn't a sign of weakness, it's a sign of strength. No one got to where they are today without help along the way. Don't be afraid to ask, and then remember to return the favor. Elliott Bell, Director of Marketing of The Muse

23. Even if you aren’t feeling totally sure of yourself and your abilities, it’s important you present yourself otherwise. That means shifting your body language to portray confidence. So, while you may be so nervous before your big interview or meeting that you want to curl into a ball, resist the temptation to cower or make yourself smaller, and walk in with your head held high. Michele Hoos, Writer

24. My advice for everyone in the industry is to find a mentor and to be a mentor. You'll learn a great deal from both of these experiences, and make sure to leverage these roles for networking. Ask your mentor for introductions, and introduce the person that you're mentoring to others—both will increase your visibility in the industry. Mariela McIlwraith, President at Meeting Change

25. I live by the 80/20 rule. 80% of the impact can be done with 20% of the work. It's the last 20% that takes up the most time. Know when to stop, and when things are close enough. Alex Cavoulacos, COO at The Muse

26. Having a strong network adds to your value as an employee. In other words, the more people I can reach out to for help, the more valuable I am. Hannah Morgan, Founder of Career Sherpa 

27. Do what you say you're going to do. Danielle LaPorte, Entrepreneur

28. One of the most important things I’ve found is the importance of playing to your strengths. I think it’s common for us to learn while in school that if you get an A+ in writing and a C- in math, that you should focus your time and attention to getting better at math. In the working world I find it to be the opposite; by putting your focus on those things that you are strongest at, over time you will become an expert at it. By outsourcing your weaknesses to others who excel in those areas, you’ll be able cover those weaknesses better than you could have otherwise. Trying to be great at everything could be spreading yourself thin and keeping you from reaching your full potential in your strongest areas. Ryan Kahn, Career Coach

On Starting Your Own Business

29. I think the biggest thing to keep in mind is that a lot of people have a lot of ideas that they’d like to turn into businesses—but if your ideas don’t turn into actual money, then you’re not able to turn it into a business. You have to be able to generate revenue first and foremost. A lot of people have conceptual ideas and conceptual dreams, and you just have to be able to distinguish between what is a hobby and what is a passion and what you can actually turn into a business. Emily Cavalier, Founder of Midnight Brunch 

30. No matter what you do, you’ll make it through. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. The thing they don’t tell you is that it nearly kills you. Tyler Arnold, Founder of SimplySocial Inc.

31. Early on in my career, I was determined to be independent and create my own success, and I thought this meant learning everything on my own. The reality is, you can’t always be an expert at everything, so surround yourself with brilliant, creative people and don’t be afraid to ask questions. Humility is key to success, especially in your early years. Ivanka Trump

32. I wish I knew that working smarter, not harder, is essential to surviving as an entrepreneur. You can get by working hard in the corporate world, but you won’t last long in small business ownership without working smart. Andrew Schrage, Partner and Editor-in-Chief of Money Crashers Personal Finance

33. Don’t let fear be the reason you don’t launch your new business. When have you ever felt fully ready to do anything this important in your life? All you can do is prepare as much as humanly possible, know that you’ve done all you can for your baby to shine, and send it out into the world. Megan Broussard, Founder of ProfessionGal

34. Remember all those stories you’ve heard of how the most successful entrepreneurs in the world made it to where they are now? Well, most of them started with different jobs or interests and amounts of money in the bank. The one thing they had in common is an unyielding commitment to doing whatever it was that needed to be done in order to make their dream a reality. Danielle Mund, Life Coach

35. If you’re serious about building a great, enduring company, you have to be willing to sacrifice some things. A vacation in the first year is likely going to be one of those things, so take one before you start! Ronnie Castro, Founder of Porch

36. If you are like me and follow many relevant business people, you often see tweets like "5 things to avoid when starting your business" or similar posts. You may even read them. But here’s the thing: None of that matters. Every journey is different. No two things work exactly the same. You will make mistakes. Embrace the fact that you made the mistake, learn from it, move on, and never repeat it. John Jackovin, Founder of Bawte

37. Be confident, don’t doubt yourself, and go for it. If you are sure there is an opportunity, you need to believe wholeheartedly in it—your team won’t be driven to succeed unless you are. Kellee Khalil, Founder of Loverly

On Doing What You Love

38. Don’t sweat it. Don’t beat yourself up about it. It’ll probably be scary or uncomfortable, but you always get to make a new choice if this one doesn’t work out. Steve Errey, Career Coach

39. “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life…have the courage to follow your own heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become.” These words, spoken by Steve Jobs during his 2005 Stanford commencement address, guide me on a regular basis. Michael Terrell, Founder, Terrell Leadership Group

40. Having an evolving bucket list or a career path that defies logic is 100% OK. After spending years envying the neatly defined careers of my friends, I came to the better-late-than-never conclusion that I wasn’t wired that way... Once I stopped fighting who I was and relaxed into the idea that different was okay, all the possibilities before me were exciting, not stressful. I love what I’m doing now, but I also know that I’ll probably have multiple careers throughout my lifetime. Kacey Crawford, Career Coach

41. When you need the courage to be bold, simply ask yourself, “What’s the worst that could possibly happen?” When you have the answer, ask, “Can I live with that?” And if the answer is yes, then take a leap! Cindy Bates, Vice President of Small and Mid-Sized Businesses at Microsoft

42. If you really want to know where you destiny lies, look at where you apply your time. Time is the most valuable asset you don’t own. You may or may not realize it yet, but how you use or don’t use your time is going to be the best indication of where your future is going to take you... Don’t follow your passions, follow your effort. It will lead you to your passions and to success, however you define it. Mark Cuban, Entrepreneur
43. Ultimately, you won’t really know what you love to do unless you actually bite the bullet. Until you give it a go, it’s really just speculation. So, whether you take a small step like signing up for a class or you dive head-first into entrepreneurship, roll up your sleeves and do it. You’ll never know until you try. Ruth Zive, Writer

44. The only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. Steve Jobs

45. Life's too short to be stuck in a job you hate. Kathryn Minshew, CEO of The Muse

10 STARTUP LESSONS FOR YOUNG ENTREPRENEURS

Starting a new business has never been easy. In my early twenties, I tried venturing into a lot of businesses as I have always loved to own my own successful business. I tried a couple of businesses and failed in most with little success in some during a space of four years.

I was lucky as I was not indebted to anybody. That gave me peace of mind and also made me want to reconsider being an entrepreneur. But on the other hand, I had to check myself if I had done it right, I had to go back to ask questions both to me and some relevant authorities in the industry.

First, I asked myself one big question; WHAT DO I REALLY WANT?

Jumping from one business to another can never make you successful. It is said that “Jack of all trade is master of none”

I will be listing some lessons I learnt after examining myself and also from some successful entrepreneurs like Robert Kiyosaki, Richard Branson and Innocent Chukwuma of Innoson Group of Companies.

10 Startup Lessons for Young Entrepreneurs

 

1. KNOW WHAT YOU WANT

If you are a “Jack of all trades” you will find it difficult being a master in one business. You need to concentrate on building and promoting a business. Do not start a business because you heard it bring high returns, venture into a business you love and have background information on, study the business carefully, build an energy around the business, acquire more skill on the business, apply your own ideas, bring in experts that will help you grow the business. No life ever grows great until it is focused.
Here are some questions you must ask yourself before starting: What do I want? What must I do to have it? Where can I get the necessary skill? How would I feel when I have it?

The more you know what you want, the less you lose focus.

Special Bonus: 10 Causes of Business Failure

2. DON’T EXPECT TO START PERFECTLY

Procrastination is the killer of dreams. Do not expect to have enough money or investors before you can start that new business. You can start very little, what matters is your dream for the business. You can only stop growing when you stop dreaming higher. Do not be content with where you are per time, always aim for the top while you gradually take the steps.

“Do not despise the days of small beginning”.

3. HAVE YOUR CUSTOMERS AT THE BACK OF YOUR MIND

Every business is set up not for the owner but for the people. Whatever business you plan to venture into, have your intending customer’s interest at the back of your mind. If your service/product is good, you will have not only return customers but referral customers too. Your satisfied customers will be part of your media team. LOL. Funny but it’s the truth. But in the reverse case, you can only see a dissatisfied customer once. If possible, when starting that business, conduct a survey on what the people want.

“A bad product can only be sold to a wise unsuspecting customer once”

4. INTEGRITY MATTERS

Integrity is regarded by many people as the honesty and truthfulness or accuracy of one’s actions. It is the concept of consistency of actions, values, methods, measures, principles, and morals. You must be truthful and upright when dealing with your subordinates, customers and investors. This act of honesty can help sustain your business even after you are gone. Don’t create barriers that can stop your journey to success by being greedy.

“Integrity is needed by every man to excel. If one is not upright with a given skill, that skill will not only be killed but have the capacity to kill the bearer”

Special Bonus: Principles of Financial Prosperity

5. SUCCESS IS A GRADUAL PROCESS

If you want to stay on top, climb, if you want to fall from the top, jump. You must do what is required to acquire what is desired. Do not rush success. It takes the demands of discipline and diligent to be successful. Take your success journey one day at a time, be focused on your defined goal and be determined to attain your goal and you will definitely get there. Stop jumping up, just grow up. No one ever arrived at a future that he has not seen.

“On your way to success, if you don’t suffer the pains of discipline, you will suffer the pain of defeat”

6. LEARN HOW TO MARKET

If you cannot market your product, you are not going to succeed as an entrepreneur. As a matter of fact, I think marketing should be one of the basic concepts a young entrepreneur must learn how to do. There are different forms of marketing, so depending on the service you are rendering or product you are selling, you can choose the best that suits your business and brings higher returns.

A young entrepreneur should keep assessing different market strategies until he finds the most effective. He should also seek the service of a good marketing manager to help promote his business.

“The heart of your business success lies in its marketing”

7. BE UPDATED WITH THE TRENDS

To be successful in any business, you must keep abreast of the latest trends. Always do research on how the business is being done by your competitors. In the business world today, most entrepreneurs have developed easier ways of doing business with maximum profit assured. They spend lesser time and still get better profit. Most business schools won’t tell you this.

I was reading a book “Atomic Knowledge” and I was surprised as well as scared for many factory employees and lecturers. DO YOU KNOW WHY? A lot of robotics can do what you are doing now at a far lesser cost. I am aware of robots that teach, pack manufactured products, operate machines, advertise on workshops etc. From the book, a manufacturer bought a robot, and the robot was performing so well that he had to relieve up to 4000 employees of their job. After a certain period, he found out he was making good profit as maintaining the robot cost him far less what he spend on maintaining 4000 staffs, he sacked another 4000 of his workers for more profit and efficiency. That is what technology can do to humanity. The robots do not ask for wage increase nor do they ask for leave or medical checks. The manufacturer is making more money now in Japan with lesser staffs and more productivity. That is an advantage he has over his competitors.

“Always go with the trend”

8. DON’T OVER PROMISE AND UNDER DELIVER

In the business world like I mentioned earlier, integrity matters. If you are rendering a service make sure you deliver as promised. If you promise your customers anything, try to keep your promise, it will help build a trust between you and the customer thereby making return customers. In one of my small service business, I try to promise my customers and over deliver. Meaning, when I give completion date of 48 hours, I call them before 36 hours that their job is done and awaiting collection. It always made them happy and wants to come back. That is one secret to success, making happy customers.

“Always know the limit of what you can do”

9. DON’T BE AFRAID TO FAIL

Life is too short to let fear make the decisions for you. It is not easy to overcome the fear of failure but once you build up the confidence to not let fear hold you back you will achieve more success. Tony Robbins said “I’ve come to believe that all my past failure and frustrations were actually laying the foundation for the understandings that have created the new level of living I now enjoy.” So if you must be successful, be ready to face failure. Many successful entrepreneurs failed countless times before they succeeded, let your passion for the business see you through.

“You’ll always miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” Wayne Gretzky

10. BELIEVE IN YOURSELF

If you don’t believe in yourself, you cannot succeed in your business adventure. You cannot sell very well what you don’t believe in. No matter what you are facing, always brace up to the challenge. Be proud of yourself and the small success you achieved and you will be a big success.

“What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything?” Vincent van Gogh

In conclusion, I want you to know that nothing is impossible if you believe. Trust in yourself, be diligent and upright, you will attain your desired goals.

Stop making Resolutions, Start Setting Goals

  It will be easier to say ''I want to make more money this year'' Than to say ''I want to make 1million'' This year.

While both sentence look alike they are not the same. Making more money is too broad, Making 1 million is more specific!

Resolution is defined as a strong decision to do or not to do something, while Goal is a desired result a person plans to achieve. Resolutions are not specific and that makes them hard to achieve.

Now in the definitions you can see that a Goal requires a plan, unlike a resolution where you just decided without any plan towards achieving what you decided.

I stopped making Resolutions Since I discovered that I never achieved anything making them and started setting Goals. Now I have New year Goals, no more New year Resolutions.

When I was in my first year in school, I made a resolution at every new semester to start reading more than I did. But this yielded no result and when the semester is already going half I already feel defeated.

This kept repeating, and I vowed not to make it as a resolution. I decided to set it as a goal. I set a Goal to be reading extensively at least four times per week, I had my plans, worked towards it and it worked.

Goals are simply better because you have more chance to plan how it works. And you can measure success and know how far you have Gone.

TIP:

I break down my yearly Goals and even write them down so that I can remember them. By doing so I become very familiar with what I want to achieve and work towards it. You can start doing the same. The importance of writing them down is for you not to loose sight of them, its not just enough to have them in your mind, write them down!

Finally Goals set without handwork is worse than a resolution itself, so when you set Goals, strive to achieve them. Start small by setting realistic goals, work towards achieving them, measure your success, change your approach if necessary and certainly you will achieve something.

2015 is near, when it finally comes, make sure you don't make new year resolution, rather Set New year Goals.

Take every chance that comes your way

 Taking chances is a perfect way to discover opportunities. you wont know if your next idea would work unless you try.

Everyday life presents us with new chances and taking them is just the very right step we need in finding a perfect life.

Quote

          To find what you seek in the road of life, the best proverb of all is that which says: "Leave no stone unturned." - Edward Bulwer Lytton

Yes leave no stone unturned. When ever an opportunity comes your way, don't fail to take the chance, even if you fail in one or two trials, your next trial might just be your life changing chance.

The reason why you have to take every chance is that Real opportunities don't come by always and you can only know the perfect one by taking every chance that comes your way, don't ignore any, try to make the positive out of every condition.

Take your chances and you will be happy you did.